This blog covers how to stop being jealous of others’ success… Do you ever watch people on IG, FB, TikTok, or in your job and feel overwhelming jealous by their wins? I get it and I’m gonna show you how to throw that crap out the door and instead use that jealously as a win instead. This whole blog, brand, and lifestyle is about going against the grain. Taking things that we think or are told to think and do and changing them. A lot of people tell us that jealousy is a bad trait and, you know, in ways, I agree. It sucks. No one wants to feel jealous. Although, jealousy doesn’t have to be bad. Jealousy can be this driving force. Jealousy can be a wake-up call. Jealousy can make us successful!
This is all about jealousy and how to stop being jealous of others’ success…
It’s not an easy shift, but it’s a shift that we have to make in our brains, to allow our natural thoughts to drive us to improve. That’s the point here.
Now, I’m talking about jealousy in the workplace or with fellow entrepreneurs. Someone more successful than you, or had a fantastic launch that made a lot of money and you wish that were you. It could also be, they quit their job and they’re successful, and you haven’t been able to do that. These are the kind of things that I am talking about, even though jealousy has many forms. There is jealousy in relationships, retrospective, and generic jealousy.
Feeling jealous of others’ success? Remember That Jealousy is Normal…
It’s a normal occurrence in our brain, and it stems from prehistoric times when jealousy was a warning. It was a threat. It meant that somebody is, or something may cause harm to you, and your tribe. So it’s a normal thing that happens in our brains. Although it’s much better to not feel jealous and I don’t want anyone to feel jealous. The thing is, if it happens, it’s natural. So how can we take this natural occurrence, that we don’t want to admit to, and switch it… We throw it on its head. We turn it around and we make it work for us.
So How Can We Do That? How Do We Re-focus Jealousy?
Jealousy is like your tough-love coach, which is what I like to call myself. It is a wake-up call. It is a reminder. It is a self-awareness kick in the ass. It is your inner voice. Your soul is speaking to you it’s screaming at you. When you allow jealousy to consume you, with the anger and the hatred that may stem from it, you allow that to become you. But if you were to look at why you’re jealous in the first place… let’s use an example…
As an entrepreneur, I have a lot of entrepreneurs in my world and a lot of them do much better than I do. For now. The point being, I see people having six-figure months. It is very easy to get too jealous. I mean, who wouldn’t want a six-figure month? But when I am jealous, I’m not jealous of their success. I’m not mad that they’re successful. I’m not jealous of their looks. I’m not jealous of their bodies. I’m not jealous of what they know. I’m jealous because my soul, my body, my being, knows that I can do it and I’m not.
How to stop being jealous of others’ success?
There is Another Path.
Jealousy is telling me that there is a path that I should be taking. There’s a change that I should be making. There are goals that I should be achieving that I’m not. And it’s making me jealous by reminding me. My body is screaming at me to wake the fuck up. Use that as a driving force to keep going. It’s not a negative emotion that was going to bring me down. It is something that’s going to keep me going. Not for competition, not to be better. That’s what you have to remember, jealousy is not about the person or the thing that you’re jealous of. It’s about you. It’s about yourself. It’s a very selfish thing. That is why you’re going to use it to improve.
You’re going to take that jealous feeling and you’re going to be like, “okay, let me sit down, let me stay in my lane. Why am I jealous? Is it because they’re doing something that I want to be doing? Is it because they’re achieving something that I know I can be achieving?” These are wake-up calls. If you’re focused on something that you can’t change, like if you’re jealous of the way somebody looks… when it is time to start doing some mindset work. Realize that, you are who you are, what you stand for is a lot more than your looks. That type of jealousy is a whole other story. You have to dig deeper and explain to yourself why you feel this way.
If you want to know HOW to stop being jealous of others’ success… Listen up…
If you’re jealous over something, that you KNOW, you can achieve, then that’s why it’s speaking. That’s why jealousy is speaking up because it’s like, “yo, yo, yo wake the fuck up”. Jealousy is no longer saying that this person is a threat, this is not prehistoric times. We have no reason to be threatened by another successful human being. Because you can be successful too.
The New Wake-Up Call.
Jealousy has been reformed and it’s a damn wake-up call, it’s screaming and you need to listen. One of the very best things you can do for yourself is to combat jealousy.
Grab it and make it yours. Take all that focus and all that energy, that you are pushing into jealousy, and push it into improving yourself. Reading. Learning. Connecting. Building. Growing as a human being, growing as a person, growing as a soul. Use that to grow and become a better person, because every human being on this planet has a chance to become better. That’s what we’re here for every day, we are working on improving. Our lives, our happiness, our bank accounts, our impact on others.
How we’re serving, how we’re connecting and creating and being. Jealousy is telling you that. You’re not fulfilling what you need to be fulfilling. Use that. Use that voice. Use that force. While you’re working so hard on improving yourself, you don’t have time for jealousy. You’re staying in your lane, you’re working on yourself. You’re improving yourself so that you don’t have time to focus on somebody else and you don’t give a shit.
This is about what you can do for yourself and the people you care about. It’s not about what that girl or this man, or that human being has what I don’t have. It’s about how can I be better? That’s what jealousy is. It’s asking you, how can I be better? As another human being on this planet, what can I do to be better? What can I do to leave a better impact?
Now Another Thing About Jealousy
Jealousy is that it’s an open door for possibility. It is a huge, huge open door for possibility. Let’s say that you’re a mastermind, which is amazing. If you have the money and the opportunity to be a mastermind, I will always recommend it. This is a place for you to connect with other human beings and other women. They might be in the same field and industries, or the same mindset as you.
It’s a place of support and connection, but guess what it’s also? It’s a place where jealousy rises and you become aware of the people around you who could be doing better than you. So you’re sitting there like, yeah, these girls are supporting me, they got my back, I got their back. We’re chill. We’re happy. We’re all growing. Although that girl made 70K and I made 7K. It’s almost impossible to not feel an ounce of jealousy. As I said, this is a natural occurrence that happens in our brains. Now I’m not a neuroscientist so I can’t tell you exactly what it is.
When you see friends, fellow entrepreneurs, people in the workforce, getting better, getting more money, getting this and that, it’s an open door. It shows you how much more you can achieve. It’s reminding you to not shut down your dreams. The doors aren’t shut, the world isn’t over and you’re still breathing. Which means you can achieve more. There doesn’t have to be a cap on your income, job, freedom, experiences, none of these things have to end. You can keep going, creating and connecting. You can keep making more money, making more of an impact, and helping more people.
Jealousy As A Reminder
Jealousy is there to remind you that it doesn’t have to stop with what you have today, you can keep changing. So use that jealousy, use those feelings of, “Damn this girl who has what I want”. She could do it. So can I.
This small town chick who is a college dropout went bankrupt, dead broke, and had the utilities turned off. Who is now hitting six-figure months? If that’s not your goal, let’s say you want a six-figure year so you can quit your job. The point is, use those emotions, those feelings. Why do they have what I don’t have? Of course, I can have it. It’s an open door. It’s a reminder. It’s your soul speaking to you saying there’s more. You have to chase it. You have to go after it. You have to follow that feeling. And that’s why jealousy isn’t always a bad thing. Jealousy is a reminder. It’s a wake-up call to kick in the ass. It’s a tough-love coach. It is your coach. Telling you to wake the fuck up. Life is not over yet. You’re still breathing. You’re still here. You can still make an impact, you can still grow.
Connect. Connect. Connect.
We do not have to attack each other because someone has more success. What we can do is, compliment them! Connect with them. Connect with the person that you’re jealous of. I’m pretty sure that everybody has experienced meeting someone and not liking them. Then when you got to know them, they became one of your closest friends. It’s the same damn thing. It’s the same thing in these entrepreneur worlds. The people that you look up to, that you may be jealous of, and the ones that are living your goals. Connect with them. I don’t mean sell them something, create something genuine, give them compliments.
That also gives you more control. You take back some of that control that you’re letting free fall. When you’re jealous of a person they have all the control over you. You might think, “actually this person, this human being, this girl, was doing something cool”. I want to be doing the same thing and connecting with them might be the answer. You will start to feel better, more in control, and realize that the connection starts to break down the jealousy. You’re humanizing them instead of idealizing them. Making it more relatable, making it easier to understand that it’s also achievable for you. The cool thing about the entrepreneurial world or workplace is that you are connected. Might not be on speaking terms with the people you’re jealous/inspired by, but now is the time to connect with them. It’s not like a celebrity where it’s a lot harder. You’ve got this going for you. Send out a quick message, get on their radar, and talk to the person that you’re extremely jealous of.
Break The Jealousy
The connection, as I said, breaks the jealousy. By using this connection, you’re allowing yourself to humanize them. You’re allowing yourself to think, “wow this connection might end up becoming something one day”. You don’t know, how you may connect in the future. Someone that once made you jealous could then turn to inspiration, friendship, or even mentorship. Jealousy doesn’t have to bring you down. Jealousy doesn’t have to stop you or prevent you from creating, launching, making connections, selling, being more, or making more of an impact. It doesn’t have to be anything negative at all. It’s your tough-love coach reminding you, it’s time to wake up and dig back into your dreams. Your dreams are much bigger.
Sometimes we forget how big dreams are because day by day goes on and you got to pay your bills. Then you focus on your day-by-day bills, and you focus on it. Am I going to have money in the bank account tomorrow? I don’t have time for these bigger goals. I don’t have time to think about these goals that these other bitches are making. But you give yourself time to be jealous, and that’s not negative. That’s reminding you. Hey, wake up, we’ve got a bigger mission here. We’ve got a bigger purpose. We are meant for more, we’re meant to help more people. You’re thinking too small, stop thinking so small, and wake up. Look at this person thinking way bigger and making way, more money. That’s where we’re going to be. That’s where we got to keep moving towards. We don’t have to see them as a threat.